Hogwarts and Cheese
by you-rock-my-socks
Summary: VeryHumorous: So it's Harry and Co's 6th year, right? They're hoping for a normal school year, HA! Anyways, so there's a murderer in the school... but no one knows who it is. Can you believe that even Dumbledore doesn't know!
1. Hogwarts and Cheese

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Title: Hogwarts & Cheese

Written by: Kelly & Brie

Disclaimer: We don't own yada yada yada…. Except the characters who we do own…

It was going to be a normal year. They were sure of it. It was the last year of tests, homework, and most importantly... FINALS! You couldn't get any better than that! That one fateful September 1st changed all of their hopes. Those cute little high-apple-pie-in-the-sky-hopes. At soon as they stepped on the train, they were in for a surprise.

BessyBoursault was just like any other girl in Hogwarts. She was okay at schoolwork, she had friends, and an overall good life. She could sense her secret crush a mile away, which was just enough time to make herself look decent. Too bad her crush never seemed interested in her. She was desperate for his attention, and when I say desperate... I mean desperately desperate.

Kaley Klosterkaese was a stupid snob. That's what most people said about her. She steered clear of any "losers" like Loony Lovegood and CJ Combazola. But really, Kaley was a good person. She was just "cursed with a beautiful face" as she would say. She knew her place was as the most popular chick in school. She couldn't help if all the guys flocked to her. All the guys... except one.

Sherie Schabzieger was not a normal person. Some people thought she could see beyond. But, she also scared a lot of people. She liked to say deep meaningful things that no one else could understand, just to freak them out a bit. But, little do the others know, those deep things could actually help.

CJ Cambazolawas not in any way, shape or form normal, popular, cool or anything else like that. She, along with Luna "Loony" Lovegood, was considered "losers" or "weirdoes". There are many reasons why that might have happened. One of them being she had this weird obsession with a collection of hers. She would always ask people if they wanted to see it, no one ever wanted to. No one ever wanting to see her collection may have been the reason no one KNEW what her collection consisted of.

RimonaRicotta was a creative girl. Everyday she would find someway to make her outfit different. Whether she changed her hair, her shirt, or her shoes... she somehow did it. She was an artsy girl, and she prided herself in that. She was always playing with her food and creating shapes with it. Little did everyone know, her little "shapes" were actually unknown signs.

When you hear the words overly smart and brainiac, you think of Hermione Granger, right? After all, she IS the smartest student in their year. Wrong. This year, Hermione isn't the smartest in her year. That title belongs to Katie Kugelkase. Who is this, you may ask. Well, she's the brainiac, duh! I do believe I just finished telling you about this. Anyway, Hermione doesn't like the fact that someone's smarter than her. What's she going to do about it? Nothing. Well, what is there that she could do?

Now, you may be wondering why I'm telling you about these six students that you've never heard mentioned in the previous books before. Well, that's why, silly! I'm telling you about them because it'd be rude of me to just introduce these six characters and not tell you a little about them. Since in the other books, you found out a little bit of background information about most of the main characters. Well, this isn't really another book, because it's a fan fiction. But that's besides the point.

So, now you're probably tired of this prologue. I suppose I'll get to the fan fiction now.


	2. Train

Yet again, it was September 1st and King's Cross was once again filled with students heading off for another year at Hogwarts. Among all the hustle and bustle to find a seat with your friends, two girls were about to run into each other.

"Oh! I found one!" a girl by the name of Sherie Schabzieger whispered to herself. She then ran directly towards the open door.

However, as she went to take a sharp turn and throw herself into the empty compartment, her body slammed straight into another's body.

"Bloody hell! Watch where you're going!"

Sherie looked up to face the face of Rimona Ricotta. These two girls had never really gotten along because they both could be very deep at times. That trait making them clash, so they never really got along. Anyway, back to them running into each other.

"Sorry, I did not see that I would be running into you at this hour," Sherie said quietly. She then made her way into the compartment, and took a seat.

"Why oh why must my aura be clogged by such things?" Rimona sighed as she looked up and to her left. She then brought her hand up to her head and closed her eyes. After having her episode. She floated over to the seat farthest away from Sherie, and sat down.

"This train ride is SO boring!" said an exasperated Kaley to all of her cronies, only to get millions of answers like:

"Oh my gosh, Kaley! You are so right!"

"I know!!"

"Yeah, I'm really bored"

"I worship you Kaley."

Well, the last one wasn't really said, but she knew they were thinking that. She didn't have real friends, and she was okay with that, because just about the whole school was probably fighting to be her friend; Her being the most popular chick and all.

"You know what, guys? I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Kaley said getting up and rolling her eyes.

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"Or me?"

"I'll wait outside"

"I'll flush your toilet and brush your hair."

Again, the last one wasn't said, but Kaley knew someone would have said it if she hadn't left with a loud 'SLAM' of the door.

Of course she wasn't going to go the bathroom. She just had to get out of there. As she walked down the hall she could see CJ Cambazola coming near her carrying a box of god-knows-what. 'If she asks me to see her 'collection' one more time, I will have to go medieval on her ass.' Kaley thought.

And, as I bet you predicted, CJ came directly up to Kaley and asked, "Wanna see my collection?"

"NO! Leave me alone, you loser." Kaley scoffed.

"Its alright, Kay Kay. I know you think I'm a loser, but really... I think you like me." CJ dreamily replied.

Kaley just stared. To break the silence, CJ jumped up fast and said, "BOO!"... Which made Kaley run away.

"Yes, Kay Kay! RUN AWAY FROM THE SCARY CJ! I MIGHT IEAT/I YOU!!!" CJ yelled after her. "Prep" she muttered under her breath as she looked for another victim.

"Okay. WHY did I want to be 'fashionably late' this year? I mean, now, I have to sit with someone I don't even know." thought Katie Kugelkase. Being the new girl, she didn't know anyone and nobody knew her. She thought being late was the cool thing to do... but she was obviously wrong.

'Wow... this is embarrassing.' She thought as she watched a girl with a box confront another girl.

Finally she found a semi-empty compartment with only 4 people in it.

"Hi. Can I sit here?" she quietly asked.

"Yeah, sure." Said one girl, who was writing down things on a paper as fast as she could.

Katie sat down next to the girl, who looked up. "Hi. I'm Bessy Boursault." She said. She pointed to the other three; "And this is Kim, Eve, and Gin" They all waved. "Look, I've got A LOT of homework to do. Being late is obviously not cool."

Katie nodded and smiled at the other girls. Then Bessy said "Guys, how much root of hemlock would I need if I already put owlets wing and toad liver in if I wanted to make the cloaking potion?" Bessy looked up only to receive shrugs from her friends.

"You would need about 5.34 inches of it, but if you had already put the nose of a Turk in, then it would be 5.35 inches. It's a trick question." Katie said automatically, only to receive stares of incredibility.

"Whatever you say, Katie." Replied Bessy.

The next couple of minutes went fine when all of a sudden Bessy got dropped everything and looked at the door.

"Oh no. He's coming. He's getting near our compartment!" She whispered and suddenly started grooming herself.

"Who is she talking about?" Katie asked the others.

"Oh, just her crush...."

"SHUT UP!" Bessy almost yelled when the door swung open.

"Hey."

"Hey." Bessy replied shakily.

"Have you seen Harry around?" he asked.

"Um... no."

"Okay." He said and left before Bessy could blink.

"Owl me!" She whispered after him.


	3. The Great Hall

CJ liked to be the center of attention. While getting off the train, she hopped as far as she could until she got to the carriages. Of course, she was the last one to get there, so her pick of carriages was limited. She saw Rimona just about to get into one, so she ran up as fast as she could and pushed Rimona out of the way, and climbed in.

Before the carriage pulled off, she yelled, "That was for all the Slytherins, Wee-yotch."

She turned back to look at who else was in the carriage. It was Sherie Schabzieger and two other second years, who seemed to be sitting as far away from Sherie as possible.

CJ's eyes widened. "HELLO! CAN YOU HEAR ME?" she practically yelled at Sherie.

"Foolish one, I am not deaf. Although, there might be bricks in the school." Replied Sherie.

"Okayyyyy. Well, do you wanna see my collection?" CJ asked, and before Sherie could answer she was already making sound effect noises and opening the box.

"Duh duh duh duh duh DAHHHHH!!" she yelled and opened the box.

"Do not show me such things!" yelled Sherie as she shielded her eyes. "Ahhh. We are here. At the school. We are here at the school." She said as she got off the carriage.

"What a lunatic! Thinking she can just push anyone out of the way. I am not just anybody! I am RIMONA!"

"Yeah, well, you wont be if you get in my way again." Said a cold voice from behind Rimona. It was Kaley followed by all of her lackies.

"My my, Kaley. It seems like your head has gotten even BIGGER this year!" retorted Rimona.

"Why don't you go f...." started Kaley, but never finished on account of yelling about 10 feet away.

"Scared, Potter?"

"You wish."

Moans of annoyance and voices saying "Not again!" and "Every year they do this..." filled the entrance hall.

Anyway... back to our main characters.

"Ugh. Your not even worth it. Freak." Said Kaley.

"Yeah. Come up with a new insult. That one is getting old." Replied Rimona.

"GIVE IT BACK MALFOY, OR I'LL KNOCK YOU OFF YOUR BROOM!" Harry yelled.

"SHUT UP!" shouted everyone.

"Uhh. Get a grip, your not on a broom... freak." Yelled Kaley.

"Why, oh why, must you insist upon yelling?" a disgruntled Sherie yelled across the entrance hall at the commotion that Harry and Malfoy were making.  
  
Everyone ignored her. She then made her way through everyone and to the center of it all. Her eyes darted from one person, to another, and then another.  
  
"Who are you?" spat Malfoy.  
  
Sherie's eyes got wide as she turned to face him. "You don't know who I am? YOU DON'T KNOW WHO I AM?!" she yelled.  
  
"No. I don't know who you are," replied Draco.  
  
"Well, I'm Sherie Schabzieger, I'm the one everyone thinks can see beyond," she said cheerily as she stuck her hand out to shake Draco's.  
  
"I'm Draco, Draco Malfoy," Malfoy replied.  
  
"I already knew that, silly!" laughed Sherie. Everyone gasped.  
  
"She really can see beyond!" a voice called. Again, everyone gasped.  
  
"Yes..." she then moved her hand up to her eyes and inhaled deeply. Removing her hand from her eyes, she turned to Kaley. "I do believe you're going to trip."  
  
Kaley looked at her and raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Yeah. Right. Like I'm going to trip..." Kaley said rolling her eyes. She then turned and walked past Sherie.  
  
As she passed, Sherie stuck her foot out and tripped Kaley. She pulled her foot back before anyone could see. "AHHHHHHH," Kaley screamed as her body hit the floor. Everyone gasped.  
  
"She did it again!" someone called from the other side of the crowd.  
  
"I told you so," sighed Sherie as she flipped her hair over her shoulder and walked away.


End file.
